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A sneak peak into Tohwikeli's values was shared in the first post about values, Preparing for a change? Check in with your values! but, they weren't expanded upon, so this post will do just that.
Understanding a person's, or company's, values can really set the stage for the expectations of your relationship with them. In the case of Tohwikeli's values as a company, they really are one in the same for myself as a therapist. So much of who I am is in what I do and why I do it. Not aligning with and practicing my own company's values just feels inathentic and gives me the ick. Tohwikeli's values are how I show up when I provide services. They help me make decisions, hold myself and others accountable, and set goals for Tohwikeli. To say they are important to me is an understatement!
In order to achieve Tohwikeli's mission and vision, the underpinning values had to be intentional. There are many reasons each value was chosen for Tohwikeli and I want you to know them. Hah! There is one of our values in action - safety! If you look, you'll be able to see more examples of our values in our work. Aaaaand, cue segway...
Safety
In order to heal, physical and emotional safety must be present in the therapeutic relationship. It can take time to establish that safety, and Tohwikeli is intentional about creating safety even before we meet. We want you to be free from the fear of intentional harm when working with Tohwikeli and know that you have a maintain power in your healing journey. Sometimes, that is a scary realization, and having a therapeutic relationship to guide you makes having that power a bit safer.
Safety fosters the development of trust between the client and the therapist. For individuals who have experienced trauma, trust is often compromised in big ways. Creating a safe environment allows the client to gradually rebuild trust in the therapeutic relationship, providing a secure foundation for exploration and healing.
Traumatic experiences can result in deep-seated fears of vulnerability and openness. A safe therapeutic space encourages clients to share their thoughts, feelings, beliefs, and experiences without fear of judgment or rejection. The therapeutic relationship serves as an opportunity to repair these wounds of rejection and judgement (plus more!) by providing a consistent, empathetic, and non-judgmental space. Safety allows clients to express their needs, fears, and desires in a way that promotes healing and the development of healthier relational patterns.
Establishing safety in therapy involves clear and appropriate boundaries. Consistent boundaries help clients feel secure, knowing what to expect within the therapeutic relationship. This predictability can be reassuring for individuals who have experienced chaotic or unpredictable relationships in the past.
In practice, safety looks like a strong committment to the client's confidentiality and privacy. It is paying special attention to informed consent, and going beyond what is required in paperwork. Informed consent to us really means informed decisions. If we can't provide or don't have all the information, then we at least know where to get it from.
We don't hide things, or gatekeep, and we want everyone to have the access to information in ways they understand on order to make important decisions, expecially about healing.
Inclusivity
Building an inclusive therapeutic space ensures that individuals from diverse backgrounds, experiences, and identities feel accepted, respected, understood, and represented. Tohwikeli recognize the dignitiy and worth of all people. Every human deserves the opportunity to heal and should be welcomed just as they are, right now, in this moment. We believe what you say and refrain from making assumptions so we are better able to meet you where you are.
Trauma is so often influenced by cultural factors, and an inclusive therapist is attuned to the importance of cultural sensitivity. Recognizing and respecting a client's cultural background helps create an environment where their experiences are validated and understood. Inclusivity acknowledges and respects the intersectionality of individuals' identities. Clients may face multiple forms of marginalization or discrimination based on factors such as race, gender, sexual orientation, or socioeconomic status and more. An inclusive therapeutic approach considers these intersecting identities, ensuring that the therapeutic process addresses the complex layers of the client's experience. You are the expert on your own life, regardless of my own experiences.
Inclusivity fosters an environment where clients' identities are affirmed and validated. This is particularly important for individuals who have experienced trauma directly related to their identity. Feeling seen and heard within the therapeutic relationship can contribute to feeling safe, too.
There are many paths to healing. Psycotherapy isn't the only or even the most appropriate sometimes. It's also not always accessible. Tohwikeli welcomes the pursuit of healing in whichever way makes sense to you. As much as we try to decolonize therapy and embrace diversity in therapeutic approaches, materials, and resources, it is still heavily rooted in white colonialism. Here, clients are encouraged to embrace their authentic selves, challenge societal norms, and develop a strong sense of self-worth.
To Tohwikeli, inclusivity in the client/therapist relationship is essential for creating
a safe and supportive space that honors the diversity of individuals and their experiences.
By embracing an inclusive approach, we hope to contribute to a more equitable and empowering therapeutic process within the context of people's unique identities and backgrounds.
Authenticity
People whose experiences have been painfully overwhelming often have heightened sensitivity to inconsistencies and may struggle to trust themselves and/or others. A therapist's authenticity establishes a foundation of trust, assuring the client that the therapist is sincere and reliable. As a therapist, I committ to being present with you and showing up focused, available, and intentional.
Authenticity is super important to people who have experienced relationships characterized by deceit or hidden agendas. A therapist's authenticity serves as a model for healthy interpersonal connections, demonstrating openness, honesty, and genuine communication. This modeling can be therapeutic in itself, helping clients redefine what to expect from relationships.
I am not immune to overwhelm, pain, struggle, or trauma and I don't pretend to be. When a therapist shares appropriate (meaning beneficial to the client) aspects of their own experiences or emotions, it can encourage clients to open up about their own feelings and experiences related to trauma. This mutual vulnerability fosters a deeper connection and understanding. Trauma is usually characterized by a significant power differential and therapy should not be a place where that is repeated.
I acknowledge our shared humanity and imperfections in hopes to counteract the power imbalance inherent in the therapeutic relationship.
Authenticity is valuable in navigating challenges within the therapeutic process. When difficulties arise, an authentic therapist can openly discuss and explore these issues with the client, fostering a collaborative approach to overcoming obstacles and enhancing the therapeutic alliance. This is just one way we see healing in action within the client/therapist relationship.
Connectedness
Connectedness refers to the establishment of a meaningful and secure emotional bond between the therapist and the client wrapped in empathy and partnership. Connectedness is central to healing relational trauma because it allows the therapeutic relationship itself to be used as a vehicle for change. A strong and positive connection between the therapist and client provides a reparative experience, counteracting the painful impact of past wounds.
Connectedness contributes to emotional regulation, especially in early stages and in times of intense emotion when it may be overwhelming and difficult to navigate. This happens through something called co-regulation. It is kinda like the client borrowing whatever they need to reach calm from the therapist. From there, the continued presence of a connected therapeutic relationship provides a stabilizing influence, helping clients regulate their emotions more effectively on their own.
A collaborative exploration of the client's experiences is promoted by connectedness and a sense of togetherness.
Instead of a one-sided interaction, a connected therapeutic relationship involves a shared journey where therapist and client work together to understand the impact of trauma and identify paths to healing.
One example is planning for treatment. We do this together so it can be beneficial for you and we keep an open line of ongoing discussion between us so therapy keeps being beneficial.
Connectedness allows for the integration of positive relational experiences where the therapeutic relationship becomes a source of positive, corrective experiences that counterbalance painful past relationships. This integration is essential for reshaping one's view of relationships and establishing new boundaries for relationships in the future.
Y'all, therapy is a shared experience and both of our lives will be affected by the relationship we have, and that's ok. We are in this together.
So.... because of these values, I hope you see how certain expectations are born.
Until next time...